"It's For You"

One bright sunny day, All American Mary was enjoying a pleasant afternoon at home when the phone rang. A man on the other end introduced himself, and proceeded to ask her "Do you know Jesus as your Savior?" O, great, a telephone ministry!", thought Mary. "Christians were everywhere", she thought to herself. Tv shows, street corners, bookstores, radio programs, and churches of every imaginable shape and size lining the landscape of this great nation. But, since she had little to do with the remainder of the afternoon, she decided to give this guy on the other end a listen. "It'll be good for laughs anyway", she thought with a smirk. "Do you know Jesus as your Savior?", he asked again, his voice kind but a little more urgent this time. "Um, well.....what business is that of yours?", she said. "Well, ma'am, i'm sorry, but i'm afraid it is my business. As well as my job to tell others about all the things of Jesus. Did you know abortion is wrong? As well as sexual perversions, greed, selfishness, and every kind of hate and evil? I know these things as well as the back of my hand ma'am!" "Humph." Bible-thumping , self-righteous fundies, "she growled to herself. What do they know about religion, much less life. I bet they haven't even dealt with major sins, and here he is preaching to me like he's God's right hand man. Ah, well, can't hurt to humor him, right?" "Go on", she said. "Sin and the Evil One are killing our world! We need love and tons of it! Come to Jesus before it is too late." As he continued to urgently relay the message of sin and salvation, Mary could hear other voices in the background. "Hmmm, she said, "Some other guy back there sounds like my old friend, Tom Williams. Now TOM'S a Christian too? Why that son of a *****, he used to be the biggest playboy in town. Now he's gone to happyville. Probably got him and every one of those other workers on the ol' party line. 'Helluuuu, this is God speaking, what can i do for you today? Would you like an order of fries with your Happy Meal? ', she joked to herself. Her thoughts turned quickly back to the man on the line. "Please ma'am, i'm serious, if you'll just give me a chance...." "Yeah, seriously sick in the head", thought Mary. She was starting to get impatient. The others in the background could hear Mary getting louder and gathered around. "Please, give God a chance, they said together. Everything Jesus said is true!" "Oh crap, now they got the whole God squad after me! Now who are you losers?", she demanded. "Are you that Purple Haired cult from TV or you got your own ring? Now where are you from anyway?"

"I'm sorry to offend you ma'am. We're not from the TV or radio or even the church down the street......"

















"We're calling from hell."









There was a certain rich man, which was clothed in purple and fine linen, and fared sumptuously every day: And there was a certain beggar named Lazarus, which was laid at his gate, full of sores, And desiring to be fed with the crumbs which fell from the rich man's table: moreover the dogs came and licked his sores. And it came to pass, that the beggar died, and was carried by the angels into Abraham's bosom: the rich man also died, and was buried; And in hell he lift up his eyes, being in torments, and seeth Abraham afar off, and Lazarus in his bosom. And he cried and said, Father Abraham, have mercy on me, and send Lazarus, that he may dip the tip of his finger in water, and cool my tongue; for I am tormented in this flame. But Abraham said, Son, remember that thou in thy lifetime receivedst thy good things, and likewise Lazarus evil things: but now he is comforted, and thou art tormented. And beside all this, between us and you there is a great gulf fixed: so that they which would pass from hence to you cannot; neither can they pass to us, that would come from thence. Then he said, I pray thee therefore, father, that thou wouldest send him to my father's house: For I have five brethren; that he may testify unto them, lest they also come into this place of torment. Abraham saith unto him, They have Moses and the prophets; let them hear them. And he said, Nay, father Abraham: but if one went unto them from the dead, they will repent. And he said unto him, If they hear not Moses and the prophets, neither will they be persuaded, though one rose from the dead.

Luke 16:19-31